Tuesday, 23 November 2010

Birth Anxiety

I'm going into worry overdrive about where to have this baby. I was chatting with one of the senior nurses in our surgical admissions team who previously spent 20 years working on the surgical maternity ward in the hospital I am booked for. I mentioned that I was anxious after a previous bad experience and that although I'm not really bothered about most things, I really wanted things to be evidence based/best practice. "Ha!" she declared, "oh gosh I don't go for all that evidence based stuff, what a load of rubbish. I've been delivering babies 20 years and I pay no attention to any of it" I was just left open mouthed, in stunned silence ...followed by terror. This is a highly senior nurse practitioner telling me this WTF! I'm so afraid that I'm going to be in the care of a bunch of numpties!! I swear if there was any way to afford or obtain private care I would be on the phone right now booking myself in, but alas outside of London there is just nothing at all no matter how much cash you can flash. I do want to be in a hospital with all emergency care on standby just in case, but man oh man do I wish I was having a home birth, with a nice team of midwives who I know. I'm on flippin Asprin therapy still and am at high risk of bleeding after the birth, I do not want to be left alone again with a retained placenta until I pluck up the guts to pull it out my damn self.

*sigh* I don't think there is honestly anything I can do about it though so I think I am just going to have to deal with it.
I'm going to distract myself with trashy trashy TV, I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here...I can't stand that Gillian...so of course I love it :D


  1. bloody hell. that would freak me out too.
    she's not still at the hospital you're booked into though? maybe that's because they wouldn't keep her unless she looked into that evidence based stuff???????

  2. Oh honey, I wish I could be there to hold your hand. Is it possible to meet some of the mw's at the hospital before you go in? Would that help? Even getting one good mw on side can be invaluable, as I'm sure you already know.
    Woulda doula help? there's time still to find one, and I think it doesn't have to be expensive.

  3. I second the idea of a doula. It seems to be a good option if a home birth isn't possible.

    Also...never heard the word "numpties" before. Great descriptor.